My life in Quotes

You Can Always Come Home I didn’t end up on your doorstep like some babies, You knew I was on my way, You were ready for me. You loved me and gave me a wonderful name. When I left you, You prayed for God to bring me home, I came home different, You loved me the same as if I never left. When I graduated high school, I left home, I became sick at college my freshman year, You brought me home, You loved me the same as always, When I wanted to visit family in NY, Things didn’t go so well, You said I could come home, You loved me as if I never left. You left me in North Carolina, My home moved with you all, I always dressed up to visit, I longed for home! I loved calling you every day, The calls became shorter, When you became ill, I couldn’t be by your side like Dad, I prayed for God to bring you home, Heaven was ready for you, God brought you home! I will always love you, Mom! I wrote this to honor the memory of my Mom because of her birthday passing and Mother's day coming up.

“There were many, many times thereafter that Don regretted having enlisted - but so has every man who ever volunteered for military service.” ― Robert A. Heinlein, Between Planets It was the summer of 2002, I just had my college career was over as I thought it was so, I wanted a new life. I was struggling with an ongoing change inside of me. I had already manifested bipolar. I was interested in the idea of military service. People who join the military have many reasons some are noble, some are nefarious, some are based on a plea deal, and others a way to help get a new life. My choices were I wanted to have a new life and I did love my country very much. I went to the recruiting office of the Marines here in Charlotte. It was a sad day, I didn't get my chance to serve my country like others in my family. I was immensely hurt. I have found that when my bipolar gets in my way, the chip on my shoulder grows and the weight of having bipolar grows heavier. It wasn't f...

“Remember that good things come in threes and so do bad things and always apologize when you’ve done something wrong but don’t you ever apologize for the way your eyes refuse to stop shining.” - Sarah Kay I would like to talk about dating but in a lesson kind of way. Some people say that they won't date another person again with the same name, date certain people with a certain name, or date someone with a family member's name. There's all kinds of criteria people have for what they want in a mate and it could be anything from superficial things to intrinsic qualities. Once upon a time, I dated three women named Taylor. There was Taylor the Redhead, who was my love at first sight, Taylor the Blonde and Taylor the Last. If you've read my blog Taylor the Redhead was as I said was my love at first sight. I loved her and my Mom loved her. When Mom loves her and you love her, that's the woman you have to marry.  Taylor the Blonde came next. I remember meeting her t...

One thing I have learned this week that people care immensely about me. It's been a great feeling all the love and insight. What's better is that I have introspective that I've gained. “Mental health…is not a destination, but a process. It’s about how you drive, not where you’re going.” –  Noam Shpancer Dealing with my ex-best friend, Rodney was a huge heart breaker. Why because we had been friends since we were 12 and 13 years old in Matthew, NC. I told people hey, I don't want best friends because of him. My dad says you know it's not a bad thing but it's tied to a hurtful feeling. I had such fun and pure times with him. It was just two guys doing dumb shit and not hurting anyone. There never was pressure from either of us to do harmful things to anyone and that's why it hurts. I'm not going to talk about the hurt but this post is about the good times that I can actually remember. On Facebook, I wrote: " Today's lesson kids: Bad people...

My mindful prayer for the weary soul I love my bed where I lay my head. I give my thoughts to you instead. I love my siblings near and far. I love you Lord who protects my thoughts. I love my parents who taught me to pray We pray at night and when we wake. I thank you for protection over my Mind, body, and soul. Now I lay my mind to rest I pray to you for peace and to cover the rest. Amen

This is just a bunch of thoughts. They are interconnected on the basis that Facebook has a thing called timeline and it made me think at 2:30 am in the friggin morning. It helped me be grateful for where I've been and where I'm going. I've been in Charlotte since 1995, wow! I love this city and I've had a wild time here. I've made a ton of friends and if you ask this shy kid in 2003, would have ever touched so many lives and met so many amazing people, I'd have shit myself. Hahaha! I've worked for companies, left and been asked to rejoin them. I've had three recommendations to the police academy before I started CPCC. I've graduated high school from United Faith and I struggled with college and I overcame obstacles to get two Associates degrees and I'm working on getting a bachelor's degree again because it just didn't happen. I've had my heartbroken and had it pieced back together, a handful of times. I've played for the Jun...

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.” ―  Laurell K. Hamilton,  Mistral's Kiss I'm writing this because if I don't get to tell my story, the story is over! I feel suicidal, fear,  anger, humiliation, and I don't know who I am. I am not this guy, I'm not a coward and I won't back down in the face of hard times.  You do know time just doesn't start in one place for humanity. This starts in 2017 when I won my disability court case and I was told don't talk about the earnings. I'm a certifiable dumb ass kinda. I didn't directly say how much I won but I said I had won the case to some "friends". The person capitalized on it and wrecked my world. Will justice be served? I don't know, I didn't press charges because he was supposed to be my friend. I wrote a bit about the guy that stole my money in good faith to pay me back. I helped him way more than I could help m...